3 Tips for Handling Touchy Tenant

"You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong. That will stop all argument and inspire your opponent to be just as fair and open and broadminded as you are. It will make him want to admit that he, too, may be wrong."

~ Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People

I love it when a tenant is happy. My job as an investor and landlord is so much easier when the tenant is happy so I work pretty hard to have happy tenants. But, I’ve also stopped trying to please every single tenant because financially that doesn’t make sense and, some tenants just aren’t going to be happy no matter what you do.

Take the example I had recently of a tenant who asked to have access to her garage. The home had a garage in the back alley but the yard was fenced around the garage. Previous occupants had used it as a workshop and didn’t need access but our tenant wanted to store a boat in there.

We figured we could turn the fence into a gate no problem but when our carpenter went to do that, it wasn’t as simple as we thought. It would be a huge pain to swing the gate open and closed and we’d basically have to rebuild the fence to make it actually work.

After looking at what other folks on the lane had done, I decided to simply move the fence to open up the garage. Our tenants yard was still fully fenced but it was a little smaller because we now had the garage door open to the alley.

Our tenant was absolutely furious. She thought we were just going to put a hinge in the fence to allow it to swing open and closed. She felt she was very exposed now that her garage door was open to the alley.

She screamed at me on the phone:

"I hate it! I absolutely hate it. I just don't know why he would do it that way. Now when my garage door is open I have to make sure my child doesn't wander into the alley and get hit by a car. It's just not safe now. I feel so exposed. I don't know why you didn't consult with me about it. I have no privacy now. It's totally ruined my back yard."

It took awhile to calm her down but by the end of the conversation she was thanking me for getting her access to the garage so quickly and she apologized for freaking out.

So how did that happen?

I have to thank some precious advice I took from Dale Carnegie's book "How to Win Friends and Influence People".

In his book he says "I have come to the conclusion that there is only one way under high heaven to get the best of an argument - and that is to avoid it."

So how do you avoid an argument?

It's not easy - believe me - every bone in my body was getting defensive, my temperature was rising and I was feeling myself change from a calm state to an agitated one. I bit my tongue and let her speak. And I followed these principles:

1. No matter how hard it is - do not get involved in an argument. Even when you know the other person is wrong, avoid saying so. Instead, ask yourself "What is to be gained by proving them wrong?". Usually the answer is your own sense of pride - which really isn't that important. What is almost always more important is that relationship.
2. When you are wrong - even in the slightest way - admit it wholeheartedly and quickly. "Any fool can try to defend his or her mistakes - and most fools do - but it raises one above the herd and gives one a feeling of nobility and exultation to admit one's mistakes" (Dale Carnegie).
3. Let the other person talk more than you do and listen. Really listen and try to see how you would feel in their shoes. Consider their view point, be sympathetic even, and you'll usually have a much easier time staying calm and listening to the other person when you do this and the other person will feel truly heard - which 9 times out of 10 solves the problem anyway.

I never offered to fix the fence or do anything further. I simply listened. And when I was done listening, I acknowledged my responsibility in the situation, apologized for what I had done, and let her know that I could see where she is coming from.

I saved a ton of energy and time arguing, and I didn’t have to spend any money fixing something that didn't have to be fixed. I made the problem go away with some simple alterations to how I handled the initial conversation. Maybe these tips will help you next time you’re dealing with a touchy tenant.

Guest Post by Julie Broad, Real Estate Investment Expert and experienced owner/investor.  

Visit RevNYou.com to see some of her starter tips for real estate investor.

Let's Talk.  How do you handle conflicts with tenants?  What strategies do you use to manage touchy situations, but still maintain a good long term relationship with your tenants?